Tips for Managing High Performers who Overestimate Their Abilities

Ever encountered a direct report whose self-assessment could rival a mirror's reflection in distortion? Join us in this insightful episode to tackle the nuanced task of managing individuals with varying self-awareness levels. Drawing from real-world experiences, we shed light on the significance of carving out dedicated time for specific and constructive coaching sessions.

Explore the necessity for leaders to formulate detailed development plans, especially for those with inflated perceptions of their abilities. Dive into the strategic approach of encouraging individuals to seek direct feedback from their peers, unraveling the potential for fostering openness and a culture of continuous improvement. Tune in and transform your approach to those delicate leadership moments, as we share stories and strategies that resonate with the ever-evolving cadence of guiding teams to harmony and success.

In this episode, we discuss the following:
1.  The importance of setting aside dedicated time for specific and constructive coaching sessions with team members.
2.  The need for leaders to create detailed development plans for individuals who may have an inflated perception of their abilities.
3. Having individuals seek feedback from their peers directly as a strategy to foster openness and create an environment of improvement.

This episode is sponsored by LucidPoint
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CONNECT WITH SUSIE:
https://www.linkedin.com/in/susietomenchok/

CONNECT WITH JAMES:
https://www.linkedin.com/in/capps/

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:15

Welcome to the Quick Take Podcast, the show where you get targeted advice and coaching for executives by executives. I'm Suzy Tominczuk.

Speaker 2: 0:24

I'm James Capps. Give us 15 minutes and we'll give you three secrets to address the complex topic of issues that are challenging executives like you today.

Speaker 1: 0:35

Welcome, quicksters. We're so happy you're here. I'm Suzy, along with my co-host, james. How are you, james?

Speaker 2: 0:42

Hey, suzy, I'm doing great. How are you?

Speaker 1: 0:44

I'm great I was thinking about something to talk about today. It really comes from the fact that I have a unique perspective because I often work with both sides of the equation.

Speaker 2: 0:57

Tell me more.

Speaker 1: 1:00

Yeah, I am right now working with executives and their team. Sometimes I work with the team as a collective and sometimes I work one-on-one, but right now I'm working with this executive and a direct report, the direct report. I'm getting feedback. They both know what I'm working on for both. But I don't share the confidential insecurities behind closed doors. But what's really interesting is this leader has some issues with this one of our direct reports and she's not able to see it the same way the boss does.

Speaker 2: 1:37

Oh, I see.

Speaker 1: 1:38

The boss says she's not good at these aspects of their role. She's always traveling and meeting people, which is not a part of something she should do. But then when I talk to the direct report, when I talk to her, she's like I am doing so well managing to my boss. I'm doing exactly what they need, even though she's been told directly these things. So it's super interesting because I think that so often we believe that people understand what we expect of them and they don't. Sometimes people just don't have a lot of self-awareness to know where they fall in terms of perspectives, of how they're doing.

Speaker 2: 2:29

Yeah, yeah, I think what you're really Highlighting is a challenge that some of us have when we're managing people who are not as good as they think they are. Right, many of us work with people who are actually better than they think they are. Those are our dream individuals that you really have to help them fulfill their full potential. But also, at the same time, we work with people whose egos have gotten out unchecked. Maybe they haven't had good leaders to give them good feedback and, ultimately, they are not nearly as good as they think they are. You know, I'm we're going through promotions and and and reviews right now and I've had more than one occasion where an individual has a self, self-reflected or self ranked to them selves as the highest possible ranking Of which we have. Like it is 1% of the population. Is that is that level and and we're gonna give them the lowest possible ranking percent crazy.

Speaker 2: 3:24

And so there is a small part of the population that I think Many of us deal with, which is just who? Those who are not as nearly as good as they think they are?

Speaker 1: 3:33

Yeah, and so how are we gonna look at this? Are we gonna look at it from the person that doesn't understand, or are we gonna look at it from the boss and what they do to help help?

Speaker 2: 3:43

well, you know, I think a lot of our listeners are the executive leaders who are struggling with those individuals and I think, if we can give them a guidance on how to create awareness of those individuals, how to, how to teach them to be more objective, you know, I think those who are thinking that they are better than they are, that that's gonna, they're gonna be hard to reach, they have already tuned out this episode. Yes, and so that's that's not. That's a different, a different tagline, a different hook that we're gonna have to get in there. Yeah, but I think, for today, let's let's focus on, you know, the challenges that leaders have when they have those individuals on their team okay, I think that's really good.

Speaker 1: 4:22

I think this is something that that people face more often than they probably Talk about yeah, in varying degrees to.

Speaker 2: 4:30

There's some who are insanely Overinflated and and sometimes those are good people, right? Yeah, that's really what you wanted a salesperson. No offense to our salespeople, but you know, sometimes it's it's more subtle, sometimes it's inhibiting growth. So, yeah, I think we all run into it.

Speaker 1: 4:47

Yeah, all right, so tell us what it. What do you? What's the first tip you give to?

Speaker 2: 4:51

you know, one thing I want to touch on before we go, and I think you can really provide some insight into this, is coachability, and I think, first and foremost, before you run down, maybe some of the pieces of advice I can give is what's, what's, yeah, let's. We have to be at that fork in the road which is this is this person coachable? Yeah, and I know that you and I both agree that, despite our best intentions and the world we'd like to live in, there is a population of of people who are just not coachable. Do you agree with that?

Speaker 1: 5:23

I completely do, and it's it we want to believe. It's not true that we can. We can make a difference, and you have to understand how coachable somebody is. And If they're not coachable, I believe you have to be even more direct About what your feedback is, or what you need them to do, because if you're not, they just won't get it. You almost need to tell them you are limiting yourself because you are not open to Seeing your growth opportunities and growth mindset. And until they get that it, you know they have to want to get better. They have to want that growth.

Speaker 2: 6:05

Yeah, yeah, I think that's. That's a great point. So what we've decided now that, in this particular scenario, the individual in question is coachable yeah, we do think that they have some, some, some room to grow, and I think that you know.

Speaker 2: 6:21

The first piece of advice I'll give, perhaps, is the way that you determine their coach ability to be honest with you, and that is first, you need to have some very Constructive coaching sessions. You need to sit down with them and be very Specific as to what's happening, because I think that many of us coach on the fly, maybe softly coach, maybe in real time, give guidance, but when you're dealing with somebody who is better than they think they are, you need to schedule some time to sit down and have a very specific Conversation about how you want to coach them and how you want them to grow going forward. This is the opportunity for you to talk about where they are limiting themselves, talk about the areas very specifically about where they can grow, whether it's listening, communicating, execution, coaching their own teams. This has to be a very tight, constructive coaching session to set up the entire discussion.

Speaker 1: 7:15

Yes, I'm gonna. I want to make two points on that. One is so often it's like when we give people advice and they don't take it. I will just stop giving advice, because when somebody doesn't take it. So I think that when you try to coach somebody and you realize they're not coachable, our tendency is to ignore them and let them be, because you're just like so frustrated you're just gonna let this problem just kind of like arms length from you.

Speaker 1: 7:41

And so be aware of that. If that's happening and you need to address that and I think the other piece of advice on that is to be really clear and concise and really have that. Make sure you you set the meeting up, but also clearly help them understand if they don't change this, this is what's gonna happen. Outcome and I've heard through research is you literally have to say I'm gonna have to make a tough decision and that you not stop there. I this is the ramification I'm gonna write you up I'm gonna have to.

Speaker 1: 8:14

Yes, this is what's going to happen decision.

Speaker 2: 8:17

Yes, it is a tough decision to let you go. Yes, a tough decision to take away your Corporate jet access, whatever that ends up being totally the latter being much worse. Yeah, but that's how specific yet to be, sometimes to get folks attention yes yeah, I agree with that right, what's number? Two.

Speaker 2: 8:34

So the second one is I think you couldn't have teed it up any better is a very specific development plan right and I think I think the theme here on these first two items, which is that very, very targeted conversation, and the second one, which is very specific coaching plan and career plan is the amount of rigor and structure that these two things need, because oftentimes the senior person these things are your coaching sessions, your advice, your, your feedback aren't heard because they're not seen with the level of intensity that perhaps you are providing. Many times you have to think back to when you were coaching or leading an intern or entry level person and that you literally had to sit down and go okay, look, here is what I need you to do. Here is number one. Do you understand what number one is? Now? Feed that back to me. Okay, by three o'clock I want you to do number one. And that type of structure gives those entry level folks the boundaries and the construct in which they can be successful.

Speaker 2: 9:39

Sometimes you have to go back on to those and lean in on that. Yeah, I think it's interesting too, because I've had conversations with leaders about people where they need to do this. Leaders forget how specific sometimes it's required. I think I've seen a couple executives who really struggled with this very simple task, which was right it down and be specific, because they hadn't done it for so long. Yeah, what do you mean specific? Explain it like I'm five. Right, you really have to go to that level and so, while you're frustrated that you're dealing with a senior vice president, you really have to go back. You have to be very specific, structure around it and draw the draw the lines between the dots so everyone can see it.

Speaker 1: 10:20

And I would say then practice it with somebody and say I need to be really clear. Does this sound really clear? And I'll go back to some of the research that I've mentioned before is we believe we're understood, we believe that our message is super clear, but the research shows that we believe it's at 80% and it's really at a 20%. So actually 20%. It's crazy. That's crazy, yeah.

Speaker 2: 10:43

Yeah, and I do think it's great for you to address that kind of that misgiving or misunderstanding of our own communication style, but also leverage that in this discussion. Hey Jerry, I said this, did you hear? Now tell me back what I said, you know. Hey, rachel, this is what I said. Did you hear that? Give me you know how do we're going to do this, and I think specificity, crispness and that honesty is just going to go a long way to addressing the issue.

Speaker 1: 11:11

I totally agree. I think to go to your point about being very specific, tell them. I want to make sure I'm really clear, so I not only wrote this down, I'm going to follow up with an email to send this to you. And then guess what that does? It gives you permission to send that follow up email, which is documentation.

Speaker 2: 11:29

Absolutely Fantastic. All those things make everything easier.

Speaker 1: 11:33

Yeah.

Speaker 2: 11:33

And we've said on this show a million times that I'm much more willing to hold somebody accountable and make difficult decisions and take difficult actions when I've been very clear as to my expectations. Yes, I'm loath to do that. When I'm like, yeah, they're not, they're sort of not doing what I asked, but it's really on me too, like if I've been clear, if I've spoken, that I've written it down, I've gotten feedback from them that they heard me. I have absolutely no problem putting the hold in their feet to the fire or making tough decisions when I've been that crisp.

Speaker 1: 12:05

Yes, for sure, and it gives you something you can look back on too and go oh that's right.

Speaker 2: 12:09

I was really clear. You're right, exactly.

Speaker 1: 12:11

Yes, yeah, that's right, exactly.

Speaker 2: 12:13

We all have a lot of things going on.

Speaker 1: 12:15

Exactly.

Speaker 2: 12:16

And I'm going to jump to the third one, which I think is also interesting, because it deals with the psychology of executive teams. You need to engage their peer set in this discussion because so often we'll see a bad actor honest on a team being either ignored or their issues not being addressed because their peers are tired. Their peers feel like it's not that responsibility. I'm not here to grow him. If he doesn't know how to be responsive, that is really not my problem.

Speaker 1: 12:45

Yeah.

Speaker 2: 12:46

And oftentimes feedback from peers is going to be more useful than it is, perhaps, from your boss or from a leader. And so engaging the peer network, engaging those kind of those collaborative conversations, bringing in mentoring, bringing in that communication, that insight, that feedback from different angles, goes a long way to reinforcing what you have asked for and what you've done.

Speaker 1: 13:14

Yeah, I love that one, and my suggestion around that would be instead of asking their peers to give feedback, have that person go to their peers and ask them for feedback, because the peers aren't going to give it to them on their own and, like you said, they're tired. They're tired of the shenanigans. They know what's going on, but if that person asks them for it, that will empower them to say it and they will.

Speaker 2: 13:39

They will at that level? Yeah, you totally will, and I think you just got to create the ecosystem for that to work. Whether it's peers, it could be people from outside the organization who have witnessed that. And then this is when coaches and folks like you are so valuable that they can come in, pull the content together and say, look, I'm outside, I'm an objective here and, yes, you're not listening. And so that kind of reflective gathering of perspective I think goes a long way to bringing that issue to the fore.

Speaker 1: 14:11

That is such a key point because this is such a at that level and you have to do this work. Having somebody from the outside to have your back and help and make sure that that person has the clarity and you've been really clear is such a great resource that people need to tap yeah yeah, yeah, and I think people don't like to do that very often. What are the three? Sorry, I was wrapping this up.

Speaker 2: 14:35

No, no, no, I was wrapping up too. I think it's just a reality of these are hard things to do, and so it just. It takes a focused effort. So three things One, sit down, set the foundation with a very constructive, specific conversation. Two, have a good career path and plan conversation to show the expectations and then outcomes if those expectations aren't met. And three, engage outside voices, whether it's peers, mentors, coaches help reinforce the messaging that you're providing with another voice from the outside.

Speaker 1: 15:06

Oh, this is great. I'm going to use these tips with my clients. Thank you, James. Another good one.

Speaker 2: 15:10

Thanks so much. This is a good topic.

Speaker 1: 15:14

So, james, I was wondering if you could share the weirdest or most unexpected lesson you've learned as an executive in your career.

Speaker 2: 15:25

I think that the thing that I have kind of come to conclude over time is that we have never been here before, and I've never been this whole before. Our company has never been going through what it's going through before, and, if you think about it, everything is always different. There's never been a repeat. Now I often say that we're solving the same problems over and over, but at the end of the day, when it comes down to people, people are usually are always in a different place than they were before, and so, as a leader, as a communicator, as a mentor and as a teacher, you have to realize that people are in a different place all the time, and you have to acknowledge that, and not only for the person you're talking to, but also you. What you think is great advice today may not be, you may not think that's great advice tomorrow, and so accept the fact that there are way too many variables for you and there are way too many variables for anybody to possibly comprehend and realize that you've never been here before.

Speaker 1: 16:25

Thanks for listening to this week's episode of Quick Take, where we talk about the questions that are on the mind of executives everywhere. Connect with us and share what's on your mind.

Speaker 2: 16:35

You can find us on LinkedIn, youtube or whatever nerdy place on the Internet. You find your podcasts. Our links to the show are in the show notes. We appreciate you.